A Letter To Unconcsious Bullies

When you’re constantly questioned about your identity. You tend to get exasperated by the questions. People are either intrigued or put-off by your presence. Some base judgment on your continent, country or the lies they have been fed by the media. You shrug it off because these strangers, do not make a difference in your life. Neither would knowing where you’re originallyfrom add butter to their bread nor make them happy. It for some strange reason puts people at ease.


Are we in the business of making people constantly feel comfortable because of their own insecurities? Their own inferiority complexes and perceptions are constantly projected on you. Your food is exotic. Your life bourgeoise. Your hair an anomaly. Different means there’s a chance you might be a fraud. Or maybe you’re exposing the other persons fraudulent life because they aren’t authentic or real enough. Every move you make, creates constant questioning. Everything you say is scrutinized, dissected. When really, you are just being yourself.


Your national food or drink may not be your cup of tea but, you are not [insert country] enough if you don’t like it. As if food and drink are a measure of how patriotic you are supposed to be. Being the othermeans, moving in a world conscious that you are a problem. Which not only does a number on your self-esteem, it messes with your mental health. You constantly hear that you are not enough. It makes matters worse, when people you surround yourself with echo the same undertones. With friends like those, who needs enemies? The expectations and reality of the box they constantly try to put you in. The labels. The saviour mentality. It can get exhausting. 


When you comply to their demands, insecurities and thoughts by dumbing yourself. Self-depreciating yourself. Undervaluing your worth. You slowly mask your beautiful, complicated and multi-faceted layers to be something you are not. Waiting for that moment where you can be alone, and just be. In silence. Where you feel safe, where no one can judge you. Maybe cry your heart out, because the joy has been sucked out of you. Longing for the days, you can escape to take a break from the unrealistic expectations placed upon you. Remember, you are the poster child for otherness after all. If people happen to meet people from your neck of woods, they compare you and point out how different you are. Again, you are being prodded for an explanation.


Why do I have to look for validation?
Why do I sabotage myself through condemnation?
— An excerpt from Letters To Self-Love from the book Monversation Vol. 1

When you break free from the limiting, suffocating box you are constantly put in. That is when you realize there’s nothing wrong with you. You see yourself. You start to like what you see. Realize that you are enough and what people think of you and don’t think of you, is none of your business. Your only agenda is to live life in the most authentic way and not self-sabotage yourself.


Is identity really important? Shouldn’t you being given room to constantly self-discover and explore and become? You do not need permission to be you. Say yes to the beautiful person you are, the world needs more people like you. There are too many people living a lie. It’s refreshing to find someone being their authentic-self.